


back seat

by behkhoon



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Abuse, Byun Baekhyun-centric, Childhood Trauma, M/M, Non-Graphic Violence, Past Child Abuse, Psychological Drama, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:01:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28382127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/behkhoon/pseuds/behkhoon
Summary: Kyungsoo is Baekhyun's best friend.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Do Kyungsoo | D.O, Byun Baekhyun/Lu Han
Kudos: 9
Collections: behkhoon's unfinished work





	back seat

**Author's Note:**

> this work may be triggering. please review the tags to be safe.
> 
> uh...this work has been in my pocket for about....three plus years now i think??? i could never figure it out myself so...here it is in its...best edited form w html and all the fun stuff...
> 
> I cannot tell you why I wrote this...it just happened LMAO
> 
> enjoy :')

Baekhyun sits on the cushy seats of the vehicle. It hums peacefully while zooming through the twisting back roads of the countryside. Soft, almost silent, orchestras play in the background, and he places a hand on the sill of the window getting a better look of the outside. His parents quietly converse about something that his six year-old brain can’t comprehend; they laugh occasionally and he feels a bit left out. It’s pitch black save for the blinking stars and the iridescent moon between the looming branches of the forest, and of course, the car’s luminous light. Something prods his thigh. Immediately his attention is directed toward the limb. Nothing’s there. Baekhyun then looks to his left side seeing nothing but an empty seat with a few toys and a sketch pad on it. A chill runs up his spine, but he continues to awe over the night sky.

Something pokes his thigh. He’s sitting in the car again and it’s dark. His parents outside of the car, seemingly screaming at each other. Now a few months older, he’s had sweet joyrides, carnival trips, and ice creams with his parents. A frown shows up on his face, as he looks to his left side. Last time, all he found were his toys and his trusty sketchbook; now he finds a boy sketching in the dark. Long, curled lashes frame wide eyes and fat, pink lips pursed in concentration. His dark eyebrows furrow, as he furiously draws with Baekhyun’s markers on his drawing pad. “Who…?”

“It’s nice in your car.”

“My mommy says that I shouldn’t talk to strangers much less…creepy ones,” he mumbles and focuses on something other than the couple outside. He analyzes the empty parking lot with its glaring white lines and charcoal black concrete.

“Well…” the other looks at him. “How can I not be a stranger?”

Baekhyun turns his head to look into curious wide eyes. “What’s your name?”

“Kyungsoo.”

“Why are you in my car?”

“My mommy and daddy said I should come home with you.”

“But, I’ve never met your mommy and daddy-” Kyungsoo looks down to Baekhyun’s sketch pad.

“I don’t care,” he begins drawing again with the fat markers. Baekhyun admires his courage, but is also frightened.

“Fine then,” he mumbles and looks back out the window. His parents continue to argue.

After that day, Baekhyun never saw Kyungsoo again. Until his ninth birthday, when he’s walking to his car, and he feels a soft hand take his own. He looks at the familiar face while his parents speak in hushed anger. The car starts with a rumble. 

“Baekhyun…”

“Kyoong…seo?” he fumbles.

“Kyungsoo,” the other laughs. It’s sweet. “Happy birthday.”

“How did you-”

“My parents, Baekhyun,” Kyungsoo smiles and it's shaped like a heart. “What do you want this year?”

“How come I haven’t seen you in such a long time?”

“Come on, what do you want for your birthday this year?” he laughs again lightly smacking Baekhyun’s arm.

“Erm…A bike? Ooh! A puppy!” he claps his hands together happily and immediately regrets it when his mother turns around and gives him a warning glare. She turns back around and begrudgingly responds to his father.

Kyungsoo grins. “I love puppies!”

Baekhyun giggles into his hands.

Baekhyun loves to watch Kyungsoo draw. Baekhyun also loves to look at the outside; it helps with ignoring things and calming himself down. Baekhyun’s parents are slowly getting angrier and angrier with each other. Baekhyun’s walls are filled with Kyungsoo’s marvelous drawings. Baekhyun wishes Kyungsoo would draw him. Baekhyun finds himself in the company of Kyungsoo more so than usual.

“Baek?”

“What is it?” he turns from the fiery sunset to his scribbling best friend. The heater’s on low.

“What’s that?”

“What’s what?” he responds, tilting his head to the side ever so slightly. He’s twelve now and he’s taken up hapkido; his parents wanted him to be able to defend himself from potential bullies or kidnappers. Something like that. Kyungsoo points to the blossoming purple bruise on his upper arm. 

“That,” his finger is cold on Baekhyun’s arm, it soothes the throbbing. “is purple. I don’t think that’s natura-”

“It’s just a bruise. No need to worry about it,” Baekhyun smiles before he receives another glare from both his mother and father. 

He stops laughing and twiddles his thumbs. “Where’dya get it?”

“Nowhere,” Baekhyun mumbles. “Go back to drawing…”

Kyungsoo shrugs and continues to sketch with his pencils.

Baekhyun is sixteen when he gets his driver’s license. Freedom and happiness course through his veins, as he gets into his new-to-him car for the first time. It’s rundown and a bit old, but that just gives it character. At least…that’s that Kyungsoo says; Baekhyun thinks he’s full of shit. 

Kyungsoo’s drawings not only decorate every inch of Baekhyun’s room, they now fill the back seat’s floor. Baekhyun wishes he was as good of an artist. In fact, he wishes he was just good enough. “What are you drawing today?”

“A family.” Kyungsoo continues sketching. Baekhyun pulls over on the slow street, hands leaving the wheel to fiddle with his fingers.

“Why a family?”

“I don’t know…A change of scenery, I guess you could say,” he quietly laughs looking into Baekhyun’s confused eyes. Baekhyun stares back, mapping out the fine lines of the other’s jaw, the plumpness of his lips, and the way his eyes glisten in the sun’s setting rays. “What’s that?”

“Hm?” Kyungsoo’s gentle hand caresses the corner of Baekhyun’s lip carefully. It’s slightly bleeding. His fingertips slowly travel upwards to Baekhyun’s slightly swollen cheek; a small line of red oozes from the cut on his cheek bone. Then, they travel low to his neck. Kyungsoo’s eyes widen at the flecks of purple and discolored yellow skin. Baekhyun wants to smack the pity off of his friend’s face. “It’s nothing.”

He brings his hands back to the wheel after brushing away Kyungsoo’s cold one. “It doesn’t look like nothing…”

“Just…Just go back to drawing,” he mumbles and he pulls back into traffic.

Slamming the door, Baekhyun angrily plunges the keys into the ignition and barrels down the quiet street. His mother curses him while holding a broken bottle in her hand; his father passed out inside. “Baekhyun?”

“Not now, Kyungsoo,” he grumbles; his knuckles white on the wheel and his face red with anger.

“Your face, it’s swollen again…”

“I know.”

“You’re bleeding.”

“I know.”

“Your parents are-”

“I know,” he grits his teeth.

“You should leave them."

"I know! I KNOW DAMMIT," he screams and pulls the car over receiving a few honks and multiple curses like "fuck you!" and "go to hell!" He sure would love to. "Just, shut up!"

"What's wrong?"

"Everything and nothing," he gestures madly before hitting the steering wheel. "Help me get out of there."

"I will," Kyungsoo smiles. "I promise."

Baekhyun is in an ambulance. Kyungsoo is holding his hand tightly. Baekhyun likes the feel of his warm skin. 

He blacks out to awake in a new place, and Kyungsoo is gone from his sight.

“Hello,” Luhan greets while entering the simple home with a gentle look on his face. A young boy giggles and runs behind his mother’s leg.

“Ah! You must be Luhan! Come in, come in!” she gestures for him to enter the spacious home. Mrs. Kim closes the door behind Luhan a heartwarming smile on her face, as she ushers the boy into the living room. Her son skips behind. “Baekhyun has told us a lot about you,” she laughs while rushing to get a small tray of cookies and juice from the kitchen. The boy plops down onto the loveseat Luhan’s on. He watches Luhan cautiously, but claps excitedly when a plate appears on the coffee table.

“Cookie!”

“Only one, Junmyeon. We’ll be having dinner in a bit,” she warns and ruffles his hair. 

Giggling, he takes two from the plate much to her distaste. Luhan watches the scene a hand to his mouth to prevent him from laughing too hard. “Junmyeon!”

Junmyeon looks at her with slight fear and turns back to the loveseat. He holds the extra cookie out to Luhan. “For me?”

He nods his head enthusiastically and takes a bite of the other cookie in his left hand. Luhan gladly obliges to the younger’s request and is met with muffled giggles. Mrs. Kim ruffles Junmyeon’s hair when he returns to her side. “I’m sorry about that. He usuall-”

“Ah, it’s really no problem,” he smiles and takes a bite of the warm treat. Mrs. Kim picks a glass of water up and brings it to her lips every now and then. “I hope Baekhyun has said good things about me…”

She laughs, and Junmyeon sneakily steals another cookie from the plate. Luhan winks at him and gives him a hidden thumbs up. “Nothing, but good things, dear.”

“That’s a relief! I half expected him to follow through with his plan of ruining my image,” he pretends to wipe the sweat off of his brow. Junmyeon takes his sippy cup from the tray and slurps up his milk. “Speaking of Baekhyun, where is he?”

“Ah, he must be rearranging his room or something,” she replies, sipping from the glass. “Should I go and get him? I’m sure he’ll be down in a few-”

“No, it’s fine! I’ll go surprise him myself,” Luhan laughs standing up. “Which room is his?”

“Up the stairs, last room on the right! Oh, be a dear and bring this up to him, please?”

“My pleasure,” he smiles and takes the small dish of mismatched cookies upstairs. Junmyeon whines for another treat. Luhan easily makes his way up the stairs and to the door of his beloved boyfriend. He knocks. “Baek?”

“Come in!” a voice responds and he opens the door with ease.

“Mrs. Kim wanted me to bring these up for you,” he grins holding up the baked goodies, which he sets on the desk filled with blank papers. “What’cha doin’?”

Baekhyun smiles, as he pins the drawing up on the wall. He jumps down from the step stool and grabs a cookie off the plate. “My friend loves to draw, so I thought I’d hang his newest ones up!”

Luhan gazes around the cluttered room, and stares at the marvelous drawings. “Wow.”

“He’s pretty talented,” he grins and points to the one above his desk. “This one’s my favorite. It was the one he first made when we met. It’s supposed to be…a bird…?”

Luhan walks over. “Cute!”

“He does a lot of portraits, as you can tell. He’s really awesome!”

“Almost half of them are of you…” the bubblegum haired other mumbles touching the graphite. “Very lifelike…What does he want to do when he grows up?”

“Erm…I never really asked him,” he rubs the back of his head with embarrassment on his yellow tinged cheeks.

“I’d love to meet him, maybe he’d draw me,” Luhan laughs and Baekhyun bounds over wrapping an arm around the other’s shoulders.

“I’ll introduce you two one day,” he grins and pecks his boyfriend’s cheek.  
Junmyeon is in the doorway making faces. Baekhyun throws a stuffed animal at him while Luhan laughs.

The car is at a standstill, but the engine still purrs. It’s toasty inside the car compared to frigid outside. Baekhyun sits in the driver seat; two coffee cups sit in the holders. His hands are in his lap, as he watches jet black hair fall over owl eyes. A pleasant blush on the other’s commonly snow white cheeks. Dark brown eyes flit from one corner of the car to the next nervous, skittish, and restless for some reason. He’s curious, but doesn’t voice his concern.

This time, Luhan is driving. Baekhyun sits in the passenger seat glancing at the white knuckles and the gritted teeth. His hands are folded carefully in his lap while his heart slowly speeds up. A familiar emotion courses through his veins, and he wonders if he made the wrong choice when a loud _smack_ is heard.

Kyungsoo gets increasingly worried, glancing at the various blooming purples and blues on Baekhyun’s usually pale skin. “Why are we here?”

“It’s pretty,” he mumbles turning the radio on. It’s soft coffee shop music. It’s a clear night, surprisingly. Winters are usually cloudy, or foggy, but not tonight. Baekhyun is happy about that. The half moon gleams through the windows. “What’s your latest masterpiece?”

“You,” he laughs and pulls it from the backseat with ease. Flipping through pages of animals, people, and random scribbles, he finally finds the one he was looking for. “Here.”

It’s a bit hard to discern what it is since moonlight isn’t quite optimal lighting for looking at drawings; Baekhyun squints his eyes and he can slightly see shades of black and gray goggles back at him. His eyes adjust to the poor lighting and soon enough lively smiling eyes, round cheeks, and a contagious rectangular toothy smile on familiar thin lips. “Is this from…?”

“Yup! Your seventh birthday,” Kyungsoo smiles, turning the sketchbook to himself and caressing the fine toothed paper. “So, cute,” he’s jealous of his memory.

Baekhyun doesn’t know what he’s doing, as he sits in his car looking at the house he once called home; Luhan holds his hand tightly refusing to look at the worn down house. White paint slowly chipping off onto the unkempt lawn littered with broken bottles of beer and God knows what else. His window is rolled down slightly and he can still hear his mother screaming profanities and something’s breaking in the house. “Baekhyun, why are we-”

“I don’t know, either,” he mumbles, slipping his hand from Luhan’s warm hold; he drives away. Kyungsoo’s not there to capture his somber expression.

“When am I going to meet your childhood best friend, hm?” Luhan pecks his lips before rounding around the kitchen counter preparing a gourmet bowl of cereal for his boyfriend.

“I wanted to talk to you about that…”

“Hm? What? Kyungsoo?” Luhan plunges a silver spoon into the sugary goodness spitefully.

“I haven’t seen him in a while.”

“What do you mean?” he mumbles, his mouth full of crunchy flakes. They remind him of a quieter time in his life.

“I haven’t seen him in a while.”

“Is something wrong?” another spoonful goes down the hatch with ease.

“I…I don’t know. I’m worried,” he confesses laying his folded arms on the granite counter. Baekhyun pouts and Luhan offers a rough, yet soothing, hand on his shoulder. 

“Where have you been?!” Kyungsoo turns away from Baekhyun to watch raindrops skid across the windows in mini races. “I’ve been worried sick about you!”

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles. The male notices the solemn tone in the other’s voice.

“Hey, you okay?”

“No,” he replies back and turns his head to showcase the river of tears flowing down his face. “My parents…They-”

Baekhyun throws his arms around Kyungsoo’s sobbing frame. It’s a bit uncomfortable, but his friend is more important. “Shh…”

Luhan laughs; it doesn’t sound sincere, or happy for that matter. “Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo. What is so special about him?!”

He shifts his eyes away from the other; hands are shaking out of fear. This is a familiar situation to Baekhyun. “If you’re so infatuated with him then date him! Don’t string me along, Baekhyun!!! I love you. You know this, but I can’t take this anymore!! Either you drop his sorry ass, or I go.”

“Luhan, he needs m-'' dishes crash to the floor in a kaleidoscopic mess. He flinches noticeably.

“I need you, too! I’m not the only one in this relationship,” he growls. Baekhyun is afraid of his rising tone and the dishes are too-

“You need to leave him,” Kyungsoo mumbles while taking a few tissues from the box. “It’s not a very healthy-”

“I love him, and he loves me. There’s nothing wrong with that,” Baekhyun whispers letting Kyungsoo dab at the gash on his cheek. He then wraps the sprained wrist, and kisses it. Before his family went to shit, Baekhyun’s mother told him that kisses are magical and healing. So, whenever he got hurt, he always made sure to have his mother, or father, kiss the wound and hug him comfortingly. Kyungsoo believes in magic.

“It’s not-”

“What would you know? It’s not like you’ve been in love before,” he doesn’t know how to respond after that. He quietly tends to Baekhyun’s minor wounds.

“You don’t know anything…” Kyungsoo whispers into the other’s hair, as he brings Baekhyun into an awkward hug. Baekhyun likes it.

Luhan sneers in his face. He lets his head fall down in shame; it also hides the oncoming tears. Kyungsoo is right again, and Baekhyun hates it. Another _smack_.

Baekhyun lays in the backseat, his head resting on Kyungsoo’s warm, squishy lap. Kyungsoo mindlessly plays with the other’s hair, as the soft ballad switches to a more sensual R&B. Times like this always make Baekhyun feel special; Baekhyun likes the faint smile on the other’s plush lips. Baekhyun wants to keep it, but a sense of trepidation attacks his heart for some reason.

“So, how come you aren’t going to be here when I meet Kyungsoo?” Luhan asks, as Baekhyun focuses on the highway. “You should be there.”

“Kyungsoo’s free at times I’m not. He said he’s fine with it,” he replies smoothly stepping on the break slightly as they’re caught in heavy traffic. “I’m really sorry, Lu.”

A sigh, and Luhan folds his arms over his chest. “It’s fine.”

“Tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow,” he deadpans and munches on the mushy french fries.

Kyungsoo whines. “Why tomorrow? That’s so sudden and I have stuff!”

“Bull. Shit. We both know you’re free as hell,” he cackles and offers the greasy container to his friend. “Want one?”

Kyungsoo takes on and takes a tentative bite. “These are so soggy what the-”

“I know right!” he laughs and shoves another fry into Kyungsoo’s mouth. 

“What is he wearing? I haven’t seen him yet. Are you sure he isn’t late? Baek, why can’t you be here again?”

 _“Kyungsoo’s always free when I have things to do. We rarely meet up anymore as it is,”_ he mumbles and Luhan can hear a few honks of cars in the background. _“I’m sure he’s there already! He’s wearing all black. In fact, he’s sitting on a bench.”_

Luhan rolls his eyes. “I’m sitting on the only bench in this area, but thanks. I’ll keep my eyes peeled. Bye.”

 _“Bye bye,”_ Baekhyun coos and Luhan ends the call. He carefully watches the crowd for a male roughly the height of Baekhyun and dressed in all black.

Hands graze over fine tooth paper; Eyes analyzing each soft edge and rounded curve of the subject. He twirls the pencil gently in his fingers before the first mark is made on the surface. His subject observes the outside world from the behind the glass window, a small smile on baby pink lips. Kyungsoo swipes a horizontal line onto the paper. He dips his pencil between two invisible points and lightly connects it so the ends of the line. Kyungsoo carefully monitors how the lines slant downward from where the philtrum ridge to the vermillion border; this connects to the oral commissure. He remembers Baekhyun studying for his anatomy final, spitting out random facts, as they cruise around the neighborhood. “Your lips are very pretty.”

“Hm?” Baekhyun turns his head and Kyungsoo frowns. “What?”

He reaches for his eraser to erase the few lines he created. Baekhyun doesn’t notice the red splotches on Kyungsoo’s hands.

The world shifts again when Baekhyun is laying on his bed and a bag of peas are resting on his face and thighs. Kyungsoo is there sitting on a chair gently grasping his hand. “You need to-”

“Not now,” he mumbles. “I know what you’re going to say. I’m not in the mood.”

He keeps mum but rubs soothing circles onto the back of Baekhyun’s slim hand with his thumb.

“You seem sad today, what wrong?” Kyungsoo rubs at his eyes for the umpteenth time. “Are you not sleeping well?”

“I dunno, it’s nothing,” he replies with a weak smile. “How ‘bout you?”

“Nonono. We’re focusing on you right now. What’s wrong?”

“My parents think I should stop dreaming and start thinking seriously about my future. They keep saying I’m okay and that I wouldn’t be able to sell my art,” he mumbles. “It’s honestly nothing to worry about. They’re always like that.”

“Are you sure he was there?” Luhan is getting annoyed which worries Baekhyun.

“He was on the bench. The only bench in the park,” he replies pushing his food around on the plate with his fork. “You couldn’t have missed him.”

“Baekhyun, I was on that bench and there was no one near me,” he sighs.

“He was there! He told me,” he replies sternly and his peas are in two neat piles; a habit he picked up from Kyungsoo.

“Well, that’s bullshit,” Luhan growls and his utensils loudly clatter on the plate causing the other to flinch. “Let me see these texts.”

“N-no.”

He raises an eyebrow at the response. “No?”

“You can’t. They’re private.”

“What? Are you two sexting or something? What’s so fucking private about those text messages?” Luhan is boiling and Baekhyun knows he’s adding fuel to the fire, but…

“It’s family things that are going on and I don’t think he’d like me sharing that with you,” he’s regaining composure in his voice, but not in his eyes. There’s a burning in the back of his head.

“What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him,” his boyfriend responds and pushes his chair out with a loud screech. He bounds over to the jacket hanging on the coat rack in the corner of the apartment.

“No!” Baekhyun cries and lunges for the pocket containing his phone. “You can’t!”

Luhan straddles Baekhyun to get the smartphone from his flailing hands. He raises his hand and smacks Baekhyun straight across the cheek once given a clear shot. “Shut up! If there’s no trust in a relationship then why fucking bother.”

He’s seething and he grips Baekhyun's shoulders so tightly they might bruise. Baekhyun loosens his grip on the phone stunned by the harsh words and the slap. 

“I-I’m so-sorry.”

“Passcode,” he grumbles standing straight and not bothering to help the other up.

“0114.”

Luhan easily unlocks the phone and navigates through it with ease; his mood brightens slightly upon seeing the both of them as the home screen. A deep frown on his face. “What the hell. Why aren’t they here? Do you delete your texts?!”

“W-what?”

“There’s nothing here,” he shoves the phone in Baekhyun’s face. Baekhyun flinches and holds the phone steadily looking for Kyungsoo’s name.

“That’s weird… I could’ve sworn…”

“Interesting,” Luhan seethes, tossing the phone onto the pavement. He leaves Baekhyun to scramble for his things and chase after his retreating figure.

Their relationship is stretching to its limit. Kyungsoo can see it in Baekhyun’s eyes and skin. He makes sure not to add the new bruises and scabs in his drawing.

Luhan is driving again and Baekhyun is in the passenger seat quietly sending texts to his friends. “Who are you texting?”

“My friends,” he mumbles; his thumbs glide over the touchpad. Luhan scoffs.

“What friends,” a slow grumble and hands readjust on the steering wheel. Unfortunately, Baekhyun heard that.

“What’s that supposed to mean,” his phone lays quietly on his lap vibrating every now and then signalling a new message.

“Nothing,” Baekhyun wants to smack the smirk off of Luhan’s lips, but he doesn’t want to get hurt again today.

** _ “Help me.” _ **

Baekhyun wishes he could give Luhan up; he now knows that their relationship isn’t healthy after a long talk with Mrs. Kim. Obviously, he didn’t use his name in case she did something rash. The fleeting moments when the other would brush his hand upon his face gently, or hold his hand… He knows Luhan loves him; Kyungsoo often denies this and reluctantly reminds him of his biological parents and how similar the situation is. Except, there’s no child and Baekhyun doesn’t hit Luhan back, as much as he would love too. Kyungsoo wants to help, but he has too much on his plate at the moment with his own parents. He often tells Baekhyun that. Baekhyun is in pain.

He lays on the floor; blood dribbling down his busted lip and a purple mess blooms on his cheek. Nothing a little makeup can’t fix. Multiple handprints mar his face and neck. Scarves are your best friends. The footsteps retreat from the hall and go downstairs. A pounding in his head and pain everywhere. It hurts to breathe.  
Baekhyun wakes up sweat rolling off his forehead; he picks his smart phone from the side table and dials a number.

“Kyungsoo,” he breathes and hugs him, as the other gets into the car. “Your face…”

“Don’t worry about it,” he mumbles and brushes the warming embrace away. “What’s up? Why’dya want to meet?”

“No reason…,” he laughs nervously remembering the debilitating dream. Kyungsoo touches Baekhyun’s cheek softly. A similar cut on his face.

“What happened here?” he mumbles, feeling the scab.

Baekhyun fidgets underneath his touch. “I was being careless.”

He cracks a small smile and pulls away. “I somehow doubt that, Baekhyun.”

“It’s really nothing,” he grasps Kyungsoo’s hand in his. He looks at the hand and relishes the warm feeling of his skin against the other’s. “I swear.” He looks up into glittering eyes and knows that he’s lying to himself. “Your parents have bee-”

“Baekhyun,” he cuts in and rips his hand from the other’s. “I don’t want to talk about _that_ right now.”

“But-”

“No,” he fumes, folding his arms across his chest. “No.”

The next time Baekhyun sees Kyungsoo, he sees bandages. Lots of them. Kyungsoo is running away. Luhan appears behind Baekhyun and gives him a back hug.

“-he needs help!”

“I could give a shit, Baekhyun!” Luhan yells and throws a nearby lamp in his general direction. “It’s as if you’re in a relationship with him! Not me.”

“He’s my best frien-”

“I’m your boyfriend.”

“Maybe, I don’t want you to be my boyfriend anymore then! If you’re going to act like this! Like a child! A whiny, bitchy, child,” he retorts.

Baekhyun regrets every word, as pretty colors bloom against the pale canvas that is his skin.

Kyungsoo sobs into his bandaged palms. Baekhyun’s heart breaks, as pain radiates through his body laying on familiar scratchy linens and ammonia wafting through dry and thin air. Mrs. Kim sits outside the door with her son on her lap. She takes a few glances at Baekhyun every now and then. He watches Kyungsoo with sad eyes, as sunlight filters around his head like a halo. Baekhyun wants to hold the other’s face, but he’s too weak to do it. Junmyeon whines and wants to go eat ice cream in the cafeteria.

“Kyungsoo?” Mrs. Kim asks, as she fluffs up the cushion behind Baekhyun before he lays back on it. “A new friend at school? Why would Luhan be so-”

“He’s my childhood friend I care a lot about,” he replies, folding his hands together in his lap. “I think that’s why Luhan…”

“Ah, jealousy… He seemed so sweet. I never would’ve imagined this would happen. I’m so sorry, dear,” she mumbles and comfortingly lays a hand on his lower shin. “Do you want me to get you anything?”

Junmyeon runs around the room with an airplane in hand. He sputters engine-like sounds from his mouth as he slows down and speeds up. “I’m fine. Thank you so much.”

She gives him a tight hug. “I’ll be upstairs taking a nap. If you need anything just ask JunJun and he should be able to get it for you!”

“Thank you,” he mumbles into her shoulder and she leaves for her nap. 

“Baekkie!” Junmyeon giggles hopping onto the loveseat across from Baekhyun’s position.

“Hm?” the boy just laughs and runs around the room again. Kyungsoo makes sure to capture the bright lights in Baekhyun’s eyes, as they follow the young boy around the living room.

Kyungsoo… Do, Kyungsoo…? Kyungsoo!  
Baekhyun! Baekhyun Byun…? Baekhyun…

“I need you.”

“Huh?” he sits up in his bed rubbing his eyes lazily, and a yawn escapes his lips.   
“Righ…t now?”

“I need you,” the other pleads.

“What’s… go…ing on? Are you o..kay?” Baekhyun is still trying to piece reality from his deep sleep. Maybe, this is the dream…? “Where should we meet?”

“The park. Now. Oh, pleasepleasepleaseplease come,” he whispers.

“Okay, okay. I’ll be there. Stay on the phone with me,” Baekhyun replies, as he slips out of bed and grabs a zip up hoodie. “What’s going on?” He grabs a snapback and leaves his room. It’s past midnight, so Baekhyun tiptoes about the house grabbing the house keys, shoes, and some other items he thought would come in handy.

“I-I…” he hears heavy breathing on the other end.

“You’re gonna be fine, Soo. I’m outside now,” he narrates. “It’s really nice outside…”

“Y-yeah… The moon and the clouds…”

“Mhmm,” he hums back.

“B-baekhyun?”

“What is it?”

“Thank y-you,” Kyungsoo whispers. “Thank you so much for being there.”

He smiles toward the moon. “I can see the park now.”

“Baekhyun?”

“Hm? What’s up?”

“I’m sorry,” Kyungsoo mumbles and Baekhyun can hear shuffling. “I’m a terrible friend.”

“Huh? No, you’re not,” he defends. “You’re my best friend, Soo.”

“I’m the one that made Luhan….”

“That was all me. It’s not your fault,” he speeds his pace up, as the rustling continues.The playground seems far away all of a sudden. A sinking feeling takes root in his stomach. “Hey, what’s happening?”

“Kyungsoo?” Baekhyun is running to the park, but it still seems so far away. “Kyungsoo!”

He reaches the park. His heart beating erratically in his chest, and worry courses through him. He jogs to the play structure and checks the slide for Kyungsoo. “You aren’t…? Soo?”

No response, and he’s sure something bad happened. “Kyungsoo?! Where are you?”  
“B-baek-” he turns his head and finds Kyungsoo at the swings, something in his hands. A chill runs up his spine.

“Kyungsoo!” Baekhyun rushes up to his friend and lays a hand over the object before looking into his teary eyes. “Wh-what were you? Why?”

There’s no response, and he coaxes the object out of the other’s hands then slips it into his back pocket. His heart pounds in his chest just thinking about it on his person. Baekhyun wraps his arms around his sobbing friend. He rubs circles onto Kyungsoo’s back. Mumbling pleasant words into his ears.

The next weeks are difficult. Kyungsoo is being difficult. Baekhyun is tired.

They're in the car. Baekhyun is at the wheel humming along, as his eyes are trained to the road. Dark, purple bags hang underneath his eyes and he yawns constantly. Kyungsoo is in the passenger seat also humming along; he's staring out the window bobbing his head to the beat. There's an awkward yet comfortable silence, as each song smoothly transitions to the next. It's warm and seemingly humid; the car freshener adds another layer of density, and neither of the pair reaches to change the temperature in the warm car. Baekhyun glances over to Kyungsoo every now and then.

Another yawn and the song changes.

“I haven't seen you in awhile.”

“Busy.”

“Oh.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really.”

“Okay.”

They drive until morning.

“Baekhyun? Can you come downstairs please?” Mrs. Kim calls from the living room, as Junmyeon runs around her in circles.

“Coming,” he walks down the steps. “You called?”

“Yeah, I have some things I want to talk to you about is all.”

“Like what…?” he asks as he sits on the couch; Junmyeon hops on and gives Baekhyun a large hug before settling on his lap and playing with his hair. 

Her eyes wander everywhere but Baekhyun. “I was wondering if you were alright. The hospital, Luhan, and so on…I was wondering if you wanted to get a therapist or something…? Just someone you can talk to about your problems. Not that I don't want to help you, you can always come to tell me things! It's just…I don't think I'd be as helpful, as a therapist or some other professional,” worry shines in her eyes, and she twiddles her thumbs.

“I’m fine.”

“Are you sure you don’t want someone to talk too?”

“I’m fine. I don’t need it,” he smiles weakly and he feels tired.

Kyungsoo isn’t getting better. Baekhyun is starting to feel the same way.

“Where have you been?”

“Out.”

“Where?”

“Just around,” Baekhyun mumbles before heading up the stairs.

“I made dinner if you would like…” he heads up the stairs before while she finishes her sentence.

“I think I’m ready.”

Baekhyun looks at Kyungsoo, confused. “For?”

“I’m not sure, but I’m ready,” the latter responds looking toward the sky through the open window. “Something is just telling me that I’m ready.”

“You’re acting strange,” he mumbles before turning his back toward his friend. Somehow he feels the same way, and his heart is lightened because of it. Something reflects onto the wall in front of him sending a chill up his spine, but he nods off to sleep.

Baekhyun wakes up to torn up walls and a trail of red around his room. “Kyung…KYUNGSOO!!”

He hops out of bed and scours his room to find his best friend. “Fuckfuckfuckfuck!” 

Baekhyun unlocks his near dead phone calling his best friend, as he heads downstairs to grab his keys. He heads out the door before he could say ‘Good morning,’ to Mrs. Kim. Hopping into his frigid car, he dials Kyungsoo once more. It goes to voicemail. 

“Kyungsoo, pleasepleaseplease pick up.”

Dialing again, he racks his brain for places they’ve been together while the old car starts up. “God, where could you be? Fucking hell, Soo.” He feels a sharp pain in his abdomen, but he’s too busy looking for his best friend who sits in his rear view mirror. “FUCK!” he curses before speeding out of the suburbs. Another spike of pain hits him and he feels his abdomen while keeping a hand on the wheel. It’s wet.

“Are you ready, Baekhyun?”


End file.
